If you recorded your daily self-talk and played it back to yourself would it motivate you?

May 31 - by Darren

In this update I’ve chosen to re-visit mindset, simply because the more I coach, the more I see that it’s the biggest part of personal and business success, some would say that its 80% of ‘success’ and the remaining 20% is just ‘how, the strategy’.

Creating the mindset for success and empowering clients to operate from this place is a vital part of my coaching process and I find that when a clients head-space is in a good place, everything else flows more seamlessly and the overcoming of obstacles and problems in the path of goal achievement becomes an enjoyable part of the process, welcomed and seen as further opportunity for growth and success.

So, here’s my set up statement:

In life, there only ever are ’4 Conversations’.

Conversation No.1: Conversations we have with ourselves about ourselves.

Conversation No.2: Conversations we have with ourselves about other people, events and ‘things’.

Conversation No.3: Conversations we have with other people

Conversation No.4: Conversations we have with other people, about other people, events and ‘things’.

Can you relate? Do you know of any other conversations?

The conversation I want to focus on is conversation number 1: Conversations we have with ourselves about ourselves.

I believe that it’s the most important conversation, because if you’re not conversing well with yourself, what will the quality of the other 3 conversations be like?

Now, a few questions for you:

If you recorded your daily internal dialouge in your head, about yourself, about your business, about your life and then played the recording back to yourself at the end of the day would it motivate and inspire you?

If not, why not? What would be your underlying theme?

What recurring conversations are you having with yourself that are not serving you or your business?

If you played your daily internal conversations back to yourself and found that they were not motivating, inspiring or serving you, your vision or goals, your relationships – could it be a good time to change the quality of your internal conversations?

I’ve found that when my internal communication with myself is ‘off’ then I’m not feeling good – I am not energetic, I’m kind of flat or I’m experiencing negative emotions like guilt, frustration, anger etc and the cause of feeling this way is that I’m not consistently asking myself good quality empowering questions.

An example of a dis-empowering question could be – What do I need to do today?

This type of question could focus you on your ‘Big Fat To-Do List’ – and I bet you feel really excited and empowered looking at that?

A more empowering question could be – What 3 things will I accomplish today that will make me even more successful?

Or…What 3 actions will I commit to taking today that will move me in the direction of my goals?

When you come up against a road block or obstacle in the way of achieving a goal, you could potentially dis-empower yourself by asking yourself a question like:

Why does it always happen to me?

In my experience this kind of question will not really serve you, it may lead you to a place of poor me, and when you’re in this place your a victim to circumstance.

Will the answer to – Why does it always happen to me, really create a quality conversation with yourself?

When you look at a current obstacle, a more empowering question could be:

How can I turn this current obstacle into an opportunity so that I can immediately start enjoying the process again?

What kind of conversation could that question create in your mind?

The questions you’re asking yourself have the power to change your emotional state, open your mind, generate new ideas, improve your business, your life and your relationships with yourself and those around you.

If you really want to improve the quality of your internal conversations then you’ve got to think differently and you can think differently by simply asking yourself different questions, questions that serve you and your purpose.

A great time to do this is in the morning, at the very start of your day.

I ask myself 7 questions in the morning. Asking these morning questions is an important part of my morning routine, it’s a habit that I’ve formed through practice and I’m being completely authentic with you in saying that some-days I don’t have answers to all of the 7 questions and I let that be OK, I simply move on to the next question. The questions force my brain to think differently, they make my thoughts expand and they create a good internal dialouge for the day ahead.

So in a nutshell, if you want to improve the quality of conversation no.1 - Ask yourself different questions and to help you get started I’ve listed 7 questions below.

Try this simple little exercise each morning for 1 week – What have you got to lose?